Now all I need is for it to be July.
I picked up my dress on Tuesday and I got my airline tickets to northern Cal on Friday. I have my first fitting for my dress Tuesday. My how time flies. It is a little under six weeks until the wedding and I feel like it was only yesterday that P and I were thinking what if M proposes. I really am excited for her. I thought at one point that I would be more jealous of her since she is getting what I want. I mean, she wanted it to, but there is no jealousy. I am honestly just happy for her. Who knew!
Saturday, June 17, 2006
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
You're always 17 in your hometown...
I went back to my hometown this weekend for the "official" engagement party and the bridal shower. It is amazing the looks I got. It was funny because people looked at me and recognized me and it was as if I belonged. Then it was as if they realized that I had been gone for a long time -- since high school. I have no family left there and haven't been back "home" in probably 15 years. That is when people did the double-take and frown at me.
It is so strange how so much has changed and yet so much is still the same. The faces were the same -- older and a little heavier -- and the trees were bigger, but for the most part it was the same. Then as you look closer, nothing is the same. You really can't go home again.
Once everyone got over the shock of seeing me, it was a great visit. I got to see a lot of the folks who made such an impression on me and had a hand in making me the person I am today. The bridal shower was a cross section of my life in school from elementary through high school. My very favorite teacher ever was even there and I got to give her a big hug and say thank you -- and apologize for being such a brat in class.
Yes, Stepmonster was there and was in fine form. She was highly medicated so she was actually bearable. P and I were discussing it and she looks plastic. We think she has had some serious work done to her face. She couldn't frown! Don't get me wrong, I'd have work done if I had the money. I would just hope that I would have a better surgeon.
More later. It is late and I'm tired.
It is so strange how so much has changed and yet so much is still the same. The faces were the same -- older and a little heavier -- and the trees were bigger, but for the most part it was the same. Then as you look closer, nothing is the same. You really can't go home again.
Once everyone got over the shock of seeing me, it was a great visit. I got to see a lot of the folks who made such an impression on me and had a hand in making me the person I am today. The bridal shower was a cross section of my life in school from elementary through high school. My very favorite teacher ever was even there and I got to give her a big hug and say thank you -- and apologize for being such a brat in class.
Yes, Stepmonster was there and was in fine form. She was highly medicated so she was actually bearable. P and I were discussing it and she looks plastic. We think she has had some serious work done to her face. She couldn't frown! Don't get me wrong, I'd have work done if I had the money. I would just hope that I would have a better surgeon.
More later. It is late and I'm tired.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
That which I fear the most...
It sucks to suddenly see yourself as – or have the realization that you might become – that which you fear the most.
Mr. Maybe that I went out with Tuesday night turned out to be a dud. Not him personally. We had a great dinner and great conversation with the dinner. We talked about family and our dreams for the future and our pasts and just about everything you can think of to talk about on a first date/blind date. (Meeting people from eHarmony is like a blind date because other than what you know about them from online and talking to them, you’ve never met them.) I didn’t hear from him yesterday. I didn’t really expect to, to be honest. But, I did send him a quick little e-mail thanking him for dinner and that I would be open to seeing him again. I got an e-mail from him today saying that he didn’t think it would work out because he doesn’t like cats.
That is when it hit me. I’m becoming that which I fear the most – the old spinster woman with the cats. Okay, I realize that at 35 in the year 2006, I’m hardly a spinster and that contrary to the 1986 Newsweek article, I’m not more likely to be killed by a terrorist than to marry after 30. (Newsweek did rethink the whole thing and you can read about it here.) But still, Mr. Maybe didn’t want to date me because I own cats. I also got a match yesterday who said that he didn’t like cats and basically that “those with cats need not apply.” I suddenly had a strange glimpse into my future of coming home to the cats and an otherwise empty house, picking up my crochet, and settling in for an evening of television. Oh, wait, that is my life now.
I have friends. I go out. I am not a total hermit. You can’t tell me that I need to get out more. I do go out when I have opportunity. I don’t like the bar scene. It was fun at 21, but not so much now. When I do go to the bar or club, it is usually not to troll for men, but rather to see a specific band or meet up with people.
I belong to, and attend fairly regularly, a church in the area. I meet people through that also, but most of the “single” people are divorced and older so I don’t have much in common with them.
I don’t know what else I’m supposed to do. I don’t want to be the old spinster lady with cats. That is why I am on eHarmony and I go out and everything else. I just don’t know what else to do. I sound whiny. I am right now because I'm a little hurt that he "broke up" with me via e-mail (chicken shit way out if you ask me). Tomorrow I will be better. In general, I have a pretty great life. I have great friends and a very patient family who love me even single. I joke about being my niece and nephews favorite aunt so they will take care of me when I'm old and infirm. I want it to be a joke, anyway. Days like today make me wonder.
Mr. Maybe that I went out with Tuesday night turned out to be a dud. Not him personally. We had a great dinner and great conversation with the dinner. We talked about family and our dreams for the future and our pasts and just about everything you can think of to talk about on a first date/blind date. (Meeting people from eHarmony is like a blind date because other than what you know about them from online and talking to them, you’ve never met them.) I didn’t hear from him yesterday. I didn’t really expect to, to be honest. But, I did send him a quick little e-mail thanking him for dinner and that I would be open to seeing him again. I got an e-mail from him today saying that he didn’t think it would work out because he doesn’t like cats.
That is when it hit me. I’m becoming that which I fear the most – the old spinster woman with the cats. Okay, I realize that at 35 in the year 2006, I’m hardly a spinster and that contrary to the 1986 Newsweek article, I’m not more likely to be killed by a terrorist than to marry after 30. (Newsweek did rethink the whole thing and you can read about it here.) But still, Mr. Maybe didn’t want to date me because I own cats. I also got a match yesterday who said that he didn’t like cats and basically that “those with cats need not apply.” I suddenly had a strange glimpse into my future of coming home to the cats and an otherwise empty house, picking up my crochet, and settling in for an evening of television. Oh, wait, that is my life now.
I have friends. I go out. I am not a total hermit. You can’t tell me that I need to get out more. I do go out when I have opportunity. I don’t like the bar scene. It was fun at 21, but not so much now. When I do go to the bar or club, it is usually not to troll for men, but rather to see a specific band or meet up with people.
I belong to, and attend fairly regularly, a church in the area. I meet people through that also, but most of the “single” people are divorced and older so I don’t have much in common with them.
I don’t know what else I’m supposed to do. I don’t want to be the old spinster lady with cats. That is why I am on eHarmony and I go out and everything else. I just don’t know what else to do. I sound whiny. I am right now because I'm a little hurt that he "broke up" with me via e-mail (chicken shit way out if you ask me). Tomorrow I will be better. In general, I have a pretty great life. I have great friends and a very patient family who love me even single. I joke about being my niece and nephews favorite aunt so they will take care of me when I'm old and infirm. I want it to be a joke, anyway. Days like today make me wonder.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
